If This Is the Fall, Why Do I Feel Springy?
Or
Where the Hell Is This Rambling Jackass Going Now?

For what has seemed like months, I have been meaning to write my dissertation denouncing photography for a depressing, mortality-reminding art form. I was going to tell you all the hows and whys of the international and time-tested conspiracy to shorten our life spans while making them more full of anguish and regret than they need be. I was furthermore going to get that monkey off my back, theoretically, by purging and cathartizing, never needing to rant and rave again. And to top it off, I was going to tie it all in with popular culture, specifically TV and movies, and explain how all of these things have made me a crumbly, dusty shell of a person, devoid of life, morality, higher-consciousness, and any sort of verve. Or I was going to write all about the then-upcoming, now-past ChiliFest. As it has come and gone, I will thank those of you who did attend, and spare the rest of you the sordid, dirty details of the worst/best day of my life. I believe I will put it to you, the reader (at some future date), to determine whether the Chili Girl experiment should be ended after its 1-day stint, or if we should give it another go. Nevertheless, you won’t be hearing about the Fest today. I suppose I could write a reaction piece to current events, but I don’t think I would do that terribly well. Like everyone, I am tongue-tied, numb, and sick over the whole thing. Words are failing me at a rate that far exceeds my normal writer’s block, and I don’t think I could say anything that hasn’t been said yet... I feel all the same emotions in the "Feel Bad Rainbow", and at the moment, Private Citizen Jutsy can’t do a damn thing about anything. The annual football preview? Why argue and fight over it? Two simple words: Denver Broncos. Yes, the same two words every year. How We Spent Our Summer? Well, it was fast, way too hot, and way too full of one-sided softball ass-kickings, of which we were on the wrong end. But look for the Tappers to dish some out in the fall league, blue & white faithful. By the same token, we have begun new Beirut battles with good ol’ CTUltraRadio.com...check them out, and no matter what they say, we are far better Beirut players than they are. Bunch of Mark Chmura hero-worshippers, I say. I think in the end (or at least the middle), what this is coming down to in my head is the inevitability of autumn. No matter what happens, the leaves are falling. Colors will change, the temperature will drop, and we will all soon relish getting inside from the cold and warming ourselves up again, preferably with someone. There are many parallels and analogies which are clichéd concerning the end of the season, the respite all things must take, blah blah blah. If I’m alone in this, then it might make for good reading, if not, then you’ll agree with me. Either way, I think I win when I say, at least this year, it seems more like this fall is shaping up to be a season of renewal, of re-energizing, of rededication to purpose and to self. I feel something in the air, and I think I like it. My normal and natural spring fever did not hit me as hard as usual this year, which I found to be very strange. I don’t feel the same things welling up inside (and outside) me now, but some kind of excitement is growing. Well, now that the dust is off the keyboard, not to mention the frontal lobe, look for more non-food-oriented thought pieces in the near future. As always, feel free to email me with issues you would like addressed, questions, and feedback. Thanks to all those I have already received from, and keep them coming. As always, as much fun as we like to have and want you to have, please be careful with yourselves, be responsible, and take care of each other.   Other Articles by Justin: "Hairy Psalms" Or "I Think I Bent My Wookie" "Noodle Soup" Or "How to deal with the random one-night hook-up." "Give a Brother a Right of Way" Or "Yield Your Beer" "A Sobering Time of Year" Or "Single for St. Paddy's Day" "A Giant-Sized Thirst" Or "Ravin' About Football" "Red White and Steamed" Or "Bush League Justice"   Justin would like to hear your questions about drinking etiquette. Feel free to email him at vitamin.j@drunks.com. Your question maybe answered in Justin's next article.